THE GREAT SPANDEX CENSUS

OBSERVATION MEMORANDUM: PHASE ONE — On the 72-hour intersection survey and its findings.

Filed by the Office of Field Observation.

The response from cycling advocacy has been logged. Portions are withheld pending review under FOIA Exemption (b)(inconvenient).

TABULATED FINDINGS

FIGURE	VIOLATION CATEGORY (72 HR, 15 SITES)
1,247	Signalized-intersection non-stops (σ per site = 38)
892	Stop-controlled non-stops
3,456	Lane-position violations
567	Conflict events, no contact

THE OBSERVATION OPERATION

Equipped with 47 HD cameras, 23 rotating observers, and a documented volume of coffee, AARBAA conducted a 72-hour continuous survey across 15 intersections. The operations room, designated the “War Room” in the field log, ran without interruption for the study period.

METHODOLOGY BREAKDOWN

47 high-definition cameras, low-light capable
Automated violation-detection software, revision 3
23 trained observers in rotating shifts
15 monitored intersection sites
72 hours of continuous coverage
847 cups of coffee, logged as consumable

“In 72 hours we logged more traffic violations than the local department records in a month. The difference is that the survey was watching the whole time.”

— Dr. Rebecca Martinez, Lead Data Analyst

FINDINGS BY TIME OF DAY

Morning Rush (06:00–09:00)

Peak Interval

437 signalized non-stops attributed to schedule pressure
89% of observed riders operated against traffic at least once
Mean speed through stop controls: 18 mph
Coffee containers logged in bottle mounts: 67

Weekend (Sat–Sun)

Formation Interval

Mean formation size: 14 riders
Maximum simultaneous lane occupancy: 4 lanes
Instances of “STRAVA” called aloud: 234
Apparel-coordination index: 94%

THE APPAREL–COMPLIANCE CORRELATION

FINDING: The survey identified a correlation between apparel compression and violation rate. In the Office’s phrasing entered on the record: the tighter the lycra, the looser the interpretation of road rules.

Violation Rate by Rider Category

RIDER CATEGORY	VIOLATION RATE
Full Lycra Warriors	95%
Weekend Riders	78%
Commuter Riders	62%
Casual Riders	41%

JUSTIFICATIONS ENTERED, WITH DISPOSITION

JUSTIFICATION OFFERED	OFFICE DISPOSITION
"Red lights don't apply while maintaining cadence."	Cadence is not an exemption on file.
"I'm saving the environment, so the rules don't apply."	Environmental benefit is noted; statutory exemption is not.
"Cars should thank me for not driving."	Gratitude is outside the Office's mandate.
"Stop signs are suggestions for bikes."	The statute is silent on the distinction.
"I have right of way because I'm more vulnerable."	Vulnerability is recorded; allocation is by statute.
"Traffic law predates bicycles."	Bicycles are addressed by name in current code.
"My segment time outranks your schedule."	Neither is entered as a right-of-way factor.
"I pay taxes too."	Noted; road funding and income tax are separate lines.
"In Amsterdam this would be legal."	The survey was conducted domestically.
"My coach said never stop pedaling."	Referred to the coach.

File your membership on Form AAR-101

PHASE TWO: THE ACCOUNTABILITY PROJECT

Following Phase One, the Office of Field Observation opens Phase Two:

Records Database

A searchable record of logged violations, accessible to enforcement agencies.

Reporting Application

Real-time submission of observations through the forthcoming AARBAA Spotter application.

Contributor Program

Points issued for documented submissions, redeemable against AARBAA materials.

UPDATE: Local cycling clubs have characterized the data as “misleading” and “out of context.” The Office has entered the objection into the record alongside the underlying footage.

NOTABLE ENTRIES IN THE RECORD

Pack of Cyclists — FIG. 2 — SUBJECTS RIDING IN UNAUTHORIZED FORMATION. SOURCE: FIELD UNIT 7.

Entries of Note

Entry 1: rider logged running 17 consecutive signalized intersections while livestreaming
Entry 2: formation logged obstructing an ambulance for a recorded 3 minutes
Entry 3: rider recorded advising an officer that “bikes don’t need to stop”

Fun Fact: At the statutory minimum fine schedule, the violations logged over 72 hours would total $487,230.

CALL TO ACTION: To extend the survey to your jurisdiction, contact your regional AARBAA chapter to schedule an observation window and document the record.

All observation was conducted in public space by lawful means. No rider was approached or contacted during the survey.

DOWNLOAD THE FULL REPORT

Complete 147-Page Analysis (PDF)
Raw Data Spreadsheet
Video Evidence Compilation

The above materials are available for inspection at your local AARBAA field office during posted reading-room hours.